We are getting to the age that relationships can be a large priority for us. It is safe to say that there are a variety of different things that people are looking for in their relationships. Some people are looking for casual hookups; other people are looking for long-term relationships. You can also bet that there are people looking for everything in-between. There are many concepts to navigate when it comes to college relationships. This is the ultimate guide of college relationships advice. Are they meant for you? What kind of relationship are you looking for? How do you make a relationship last? When is it time to leave a relationship?… And much more!
Should you be in a Relationship in College?
The answer to this question really depends on the person asking it! First of all, there can be a lot of pressure to seek out a relationship in college. This is the first problem with a lot of young relationships. Don’t look for them, let it happen naturally. If you feel like you have to force a connection with someone, chances are, that will not be a long-lasting relationship. Also, keep your priorities in line. Be sure that you can manage your workload and your own mental health before you take on the time and emotional commitment of another person.
How to Manage a Relationship in College
In order to manage a healthy relationship in college, both people must be on the same page. It is important to make sure that you each understand and support the time commitment of each persons schedule. Have an agreement about what the expectations are about how often you will text, talk on the phone, and see each other. Understand the difficulty of your partners major, whether or not they have a job, and if they have other significant priorities. Make sure you are okay with all of these things before you commit to a relationship. Don’t sell yourself short, because you deserve to be with someone who will make you a priority too! The key to healthy relationships in college and beyond, is communicate about expectations and how they will be met.
How to Make a Long Distance Relationship Work in College
There are many circumstances that cause long distance relationships in college. These circumstances can include things such as attending colleges far away from each other, or one person graduating high-school before the other. However, both parties need to be in equal agreement that they are interested in trying a long distance relationship. Long distance relationships can be a huge emotional undertaking, and will take equal effort from both people. It is vital to keep in mind that a long distance relationship should only be considered if there is already an immense amount of trust in the relationship. Long distance relationships can include many trying times, and it is very difficult to repair issues when you are far away from your partner. Before you decide to embark on a long distance relationship, be sure that you truly want to and you’re not just hanging on to something to avoid change.
How are College Relationships Different from High-School Relationships?
Even if you are dating the same person in college that you were dating in high-school, your relationship will change drastically. Transitioning into college means that you are entering adulthood and beginning to make your own decisions. Often times, this is when it will become clear whether or not you are truly on the same page with your partner. Also, there will begin to be be opportunities to make decisions together. This can be a hard thing to do and will be very telling of who is willing to compromise. It is common for a couple to begin living together in college which will naturally mean seeing much more of each other than you did in high-school. Because of all the decision making involved, college relationships begin to be much more high stakes than high-school relationships.
Is my Relationship Toxic? Should I Leave my Relationship?
One of the easiest ways to tell if a college relationship is toxic is your partner getting in the way of your studies. It is understandable that relationships require a certain amount of time commitment. However, when this time commitment becomes so large that it gets in the way of school, you have a problem. You also may be in a toxic relationship if your partner gets angry and jealous about your social life. Yes, you should not be flirting with other people while you are in a relationship. However, you are absolutely allowed to have friends!
Should you use Dating Apps in College?
To each their own! From what I have seen, college students on dating apps are generally just look for hook-ups. Of course there are exceptions to this, but overall dating apps probably aren’t the best tool for finding a relationship. As a college student, you have many opportunities to be social through classes, sports, extracurriculars, and school sponsored organizations. Give yourself a chance to meet someone naturally. Another thing to consider is the dangers of dating apps. Sexual assault statistics are very high in college, and meeting up with strangers is not the safest idea.
Is it Okay to Have Casual Relationships/Sex in College?
It’s your call. You know best what makes you happy and fulfilled. A lot of college students have open relationships, or are just looking to hook-up with people. However, keep in mind that this path is not always the safest. Unfortunately, college is a great place to pick up an STD. You also don’t want any pregnancy scares. Always be mindful of staying true to what you believe in and not letting people pressure you into doing things that you don’t want to. Making sure that you are being safe and respecting yourself should always be the top priority!
Do College Relationships Last?
Yes and no. It is absolutely possible to make a relationship last! When both people share mutual goals and passions, and are willing to put in the effort, it can be done! First and foremost, make sure that you are respecting yourself and your standards. Work for what you love and believe in, not what others are pressuring you to do.
Let me know your thoughts in the comments!
I met my husband when I was in College. He lived in a different city; but we both knew it was right. We have been married almost 32 years now! There were no dating apps back then but I am not sure I would have trusted the profiles on an app now or then.
What a great success story; thanks for sharing!
This is great advice! 🙂 I appreciate the fact that you included iformation & advice about toxic relationships as well. It can be hard to identify the problems. I thought your advice with long- distance realationships was spot on, too!
Thank you for the positive feedback!
I’ve been married to my hubby for 26 years. We met when I was still at high school. We were great friends long before we became lovers … for anyone worried about being in the “friend zone” … it’s a pretty good basis for a living, long-term relationship.
I completely agree! Thank you for sharing!
You addressed some really important things that I think a lot of people fresh out of high school don’t think about. We change so much as we transition to college. There is so much pressure. You just have to trust your instinct when it comes to college relationships.
I was an older college student so I was already married when I was in college LOL
I met my husband in college. We didn’t date until years after we graduated though. Sometimes it best to mature and find yourself first.
In many cases, that’s true! It’s very important to find yourself before entering a relationship.
It’s a difficult topic. Everyone is different and our culture push us to do certain things. If there is a person you care about you should always try to reach out.
Great topic! I totally agree with you about the dating apps! love is a beautiful thing and as you said it should not be forced! Thanks for sharing this !
-The Handy Journal-
Many people don’t agree with me on that one, lol! Thank you for the feedback!
I think college is the phase of discovery that’s why it’s always great to look after yourself first before loving someone wholeheartedly
Yah..my college relationship did not end so well. Hope I have read this before :'(
I agree with you. Some are lucky when their relationships pursue. They grow together in time. Some do not. With mutual respect and love for each other, a relationship will prosper, regardless of age. 🙂
Cha at Little MisadvenCHA
Your blog post is very interesting! This topic targets young people and gives much wisdom for relationships.
This post should be required reading for all college students, it’s that good. You are very thorough, and your voice is entirely relatable. Great post!
Thank you so much for the positive feedback! It really means a lot 🙂
People are so vulnerable as young adults, and it is easy to get into toxic or less-than-healthy relationships. Thank you for raising that point – DONT SETTLE!
thanks for sharing your story. great post
Balancing college and relationships is a hard thing, you have to be very focused in a lot of areas all at the same time.
I think that everyone should start dating whenever they feel ready do to so. If they feel that a relationship is the right things at that particular moment, then they should go for it. It’s everyone’s choice. And, of course, each relationship is a learning opportunity.
Being in a relationship in college is also nice, but of course have to abide with your own rules. Do it right, and you will enjoy its benefits.
I really enjoyed reading this! You made some great point and provided god informative about dating sites. I agree dating shouldn’t be forced.
College for me was finding myself. This is a really intresting post. Thanks for sharing some good points
This was an interesting read. I was in a relationship for majority of the time I was in college and regretted it after. It should be a time of self discovery and for me being in the relationship was toxic. I wished I was single if I could turn back time but everything happens for a reason and it teaches you about yourself.
Very helpful read for a success relationship. Though I’m not a college student any more but in my family there are many youngsters who might get help from reading this blog. I’ll share with them. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you for sharing! I hope this article will be helpful!
It’s really an interesting topic. I completely agree that the key to healthy relationships in college and beyond is communicating about expectations and how they will be met. Youth in this phase of life should read this post.